


Soul Room

by Colamiilk



Category: Soul Eater
Genre: Adult content all around, Body Horror, Child Abuse, Corpses, Horror, M/M, Madness, PTSD, Religious Imagery, Some fluff but its hard to notice past everything else, angst? maybe, controversial trauma response, idk I wouldn't classify it that way but maybe it is
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-23
Updated: 2020-08-23
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:00:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26066134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Colamiilk/pseuds/Colamiilk
Summary: There was something else going on… blue candles flickered to life around the room and cast the entire room in a dark unsettling glow. Giriko’s mouth went sour, this certainly wasn’t right. This was some planned out bullshit and he knew it. He didn’t get a chance to figure it out before the patter of a child’s feet ran behind him breaking through the silence with a shocked gasp. There was someone here.
Relationships: Giriko/Justin Law
Comments: 2
Kudos: 6





	Soul Room

**Author's Note:**

  * For [consolusmaximus](https://archiveofourown.org/users/consolusmaximus/gifts).



> I SAID I'd do this fic forever ago and to be fair I did do it forever ago but I never knew how to end it, this fic is a bit nonsensical and hard to read, but for once I did that on purpose so hopefully I pulled it off. The 'prompt' or idea I was given for this was 'Soul and Crona (and Tsubaki's brother) both have a room or world that is known as their soul, both covering very significant things about them, I wonder what Justin's would be?' 
> 
> Please enjoy!

Giriko wasn’t afraid to admit he liked Justin best when the brat was asleep, slack jawed and drooling on his chest in a tired puddle that seemed to completely melt into his side until there was no gap between them at all. Like this Justin was fucking still and quiet, he didn’t move unless there were extremely sudden movements, in which case he flung up so fast that he had thrown Giriko out of bed before, but he  _ normally  _ didn’t move. It was a fucking relief to have the kid shut up and get of his high horse to koala on and fall asleep. 

Which was what was happening right now. Justin had conked out pretty much the second he got home, falling to bed after some kind of mission Giriko hadn’t listened to him explain when he left. Whatever it was had to have really worn the scythe out though because the brat didn’t even go to the bathroom to get undressed, he had kicked his shoes and wiggled out of his pants without even lifting his face out of the covers, Giriko would’ve teased him about it if it weren’t for the fact that he wouldn’t even hear the taunts with his ears all plugged up. 

From there Justin actually did sit up, silently ripping off his layers of clothing until he was only in his undershirt and kicked his clothes off the bed to lay back down in a huffy mess. As much as Giriko wanted to poke fun and shit talk the other once his earbuds were out, he also didn’t want this to be his last day alive. It was clear something had happened and Justin wasn’t in the mood for anything but sleep. Giriko wasn’t going to mess with that and get an arm bitten off. He almost left the room entirely to leave the scythe to ruminate in peace until Justin looked at him with a glare that demanded him to come over and be a bed warmer for his unbearably cold feet he always pressed on Giriko’s legs like an asshole. 

Such an entitled piece of shit.

Groaning as if he was being forced into this he came over with an annoyed scowl and pushed Justin up like he was a blanket and sat down, letting the scythe flop back over him once he was settled. Justin made a noise in response, but he honestly couldn’t tell if it was annoyed or pleased. It really didn’t matter either way cause Justin wasn’t moving… it took Giriko about 3 seconds to realize Justin wasn’t just still, he was  _ out _ , completely passed out already. He usually didn’t give half a shit what missions Justin did for the academy but he was really going to have to ask what the hell this one was to leave the scythe this much of a mess.

Looking down again Giriko hummed with a rarely shown pleasure as he saw Justin’s rat nest of hair brush up his arm and a cute face with soft pink lips bend into view as the scythe resettled himself on the enchanter’s arm. There was always a moment Giriko had before doing anything like this where he looked around, even in their own apartment, making sure no one was watching before he met their lips in a soft kiss, a low hum of pleasure rippling out from his chest as Justin kissed back ever so gently in reflex.

It was far too sweet and Giriko would kill someone before admitting it had ever happened, but as he sank down into the soft bed alongside Justin, letting his head rest on top on the brat’s own, he found himself grateful for this moment. Silent and soft, intertwined with Justin so entirely that it was almost like they had melted into one. It was a sensation Giriko had never felt before Justin, had never imagined feeling before… a feeling of being complete. 

The idea of other halves was bullshit, Giriko would gag if anyone were to call them soulmates (not that anyone would with how much the academy hated him). It didn’t even make sense for his soulmate to be so young, if they did exist surely it would’ve been someone centuries ago and not this brat that made him feel so ridiculously loved despite everything. Still, he couldn’t help but fall asleep alongside the scythe with a heavy sigh that let out all his stress as he sunk further down into unconsciousness. 

And woke up.

Giriko’s head felt wrong as he looked around what most certainly wasn’t their bedroom. Had he been fucking drugged? This looked like a goddamn… what was this? Standing up Giriko huffed with how ridiculously hard it was to get back up to his full height after being passed out on the floor. He was way too fucking old for this… whoever did this was going to fucking pay for that. He wasn’t sure how they had gotten past both him and Justin to fucking drug them or whatever but he was ready to take a sledgehammer to their teeth.

Stretching out slightly he moved deeper into the building to realize he was in a chapel, pews stretched out in front of him framing around an altar in a perfect formation that made Giriko grimace in disgust. Who the hell brought him here? It looked far too nice to be the location someone would pick to commit a murder or whatever. It was soft, black and grey plush seats and white adornments decorated the room with elegant death statues and crosses… This place actually looked too nice to be a church… it looked almost like an art piece, completely untouched by the outside world.

Was this a dream then? Why the fuck would he ever dream about a church? He had been around for centuries and he was certain he had never found himself in any dream or situation like this… There was something else going on… blue candles flickered to life around the room and cast the entire room in a dark unsettling glow. Giriko’s mouth went sour, this certainly wasn’t right. This was some planned out bullshit and he knew it. He didn’t get a chance to figure it out before the patter of a child’s feet ran behind him breaking through the silence with a shocked gasp. There was someone here.

Turning around with an awful glare he looked for the child, completely unafraid of scaring the little twerp as long as he could get his answer. The kid had sounded surprised with his little breath to see Giriko here, just as confused as him. The poor fuck probably wanted Giriko out of here as much as Giriko wanted out. Maybe that’d help them here, they could work to a mutual goal. Giriko really didn’t care too much about how this was going to go down though, he just wanted to find the other living soul here and stop this dumb game before it even started.

“Hey brat, come out from wherever the fuck you are.” Giriko didn’t mean for his voice to be playful in the slightest but from the soft giggle he heard in a set of the pews behind him he realized this little shit was taking this as a challenge, like they were actually going to play hide and seek. Giriko’s temper sky rocketed, his face knotted up into a sharp shark-toothed smile as he looked around. He was going to eat this kid alive for wasting his time like this. 

“I mean it you piece of shit, show yourself before I find you and make you regret this game!” There was another laugh, this time to his right, where the altar was. Giriko thundered over there, taking heavy threatening steps and keeping his eyes trained on the podium the kid had to be hiding behind. He was going to end this game right here, he was going to get out of here and-

“Justin?” Looking behind the choir bench he was met with two giant blue eyes and soft blonde hair- a child who’s dumb smile that was scarily reminciment of Justin’s own. This was Justin… why the fuck was he so tiny? The little brat jumped up with a cute laugh as he moved to grab onto Giriko’s hands and pull him around the room. Giriko tripped after him, far too confused to stop this in its tracks. His mind was running in overtime trying to figure out how he had ended up here before it settled dead on what it had to be.

This was Justin’s soul… he had entered Justin’s soul when they fell asleep… the scythe had let him in and now he was in this weird ass church that… that Justin inhabited as a kid. Justin was a kid in his soul, a tiny one at that. No wonder he was such a brat. Now thoroughly interested in looking around Giriko let himself get pulled along by the baby scythe who seemed to know him based on how attached he was to Giriko already but didn’t seem to have the same understanding or pompous attitude as his older counterpart. 

“Come on, come on! I want to play, play with me!” Justin didn’t have very much strength as small as he was like this but he was really tugging with all his might trying to get Giriko to move faster, deeper into the church towards one of the back rooms. Suddenly Giriko stopped dead, ignoring how the scythe whined and pulled harder trying to get him to go through the ornate silver door with him… he had a bad feeling about this. 

“Hey uh… what's back there?” There was something intimidating about even looking at that door, it was like there was something so bad behind it that Giriko could feel it's wavelength through the metal. Justin stopped, looking over at the door longingly but not willing to let go of Giriko’s hand either. Giriko was being as patient as he fucking could but when Justin’s finger dipped nervously into his mouth, and he just shuffled closer to Giriko’s legs he realized there was no fucking point. Or at least that was what he was starting to think before Justin finally mumbled past his fingers. 

“My daddy’s back there.” Giriko’s mind froze, Justin… Justin had a family? He felt like a fucking moron for not realizing that until now because of course he did he was a teenager… but if that was true why had he never heard of them before? Surely they’d have something to say about their young child dating an older than dirt war criminal. A weird sticky feeling came over him, the door which had already seemed overwhelmingly dangerous started to seem even worse and he wasn’t even sure why.

“Come on, up, come up.” Reaching down to pick Justin up he used his very old limited knowledge of dealing with children to make sure he’d get Justin into his arms, up and off the floor so he couldn’t run off. This was Justin’s soul, he was always here, but for some reason Giriko was still finding himself wanting to somehow protect the brat from… well, from his own mind. There was something wrong here and he knew it. 

What the hell was he going to do about it though? He really only had two options right now, ignore the door and, knowing Justin, never learn what is behind it, or open it. Ignoring it was extremely tempting, he could just awkwardly spend the night in the chapel until they woke up and just pretend everything was fine… He really hadn’t gotten to the point he was in life just turning a blind eye to shit though. Plus Death loved,  _ loved  _ to have people play that game so…

“How about you wait out here? I can check it out first, I think something’s up back there.” Justin looked up at him with giant round eyes, taking his sweet fucking time to process what Giriko was saying here. There was a bit of silence, and then Justin started wiggling, trying to get down and presumably get away. Swearing Giriko tightened his grip, trying desperately to not let Justin go do something stupid. Justin was fucking tiny though and managed to slip through his arms and run off to the door, pressing his back to it with an unsettling smile. The level of panic flooding into Giriko’s soul right now was fucking indescribable, whatever was back there was a part of Justin, it wasn’t going to hurt him but… it really didn’t feel that way.

“You can’t get through the door alone, but I can let you in. It’s the confessional.” Justin whispered it, a hushed tone that was said loud enough that he could still hear but carried the idea that this was knowledge that shouldn’t be shared. 

Somehow the word  _ ‘confessional’  _ sounded straight up evil, Justin’s lips quirked up with it, grim and sadistic. Giriko had seen Justin make faces like that before, but as an adult, a livid, pained adult that was barely staying in control of his unbearable madness. This fucking baby, this kid that couldn’t be older than 7 shouldn’t have been able to pull that expression. 

“Justin wait!” He barely wasted anytime screaming out for the brat to stop it but it still wasn’t fast enough. Justin slipped through the door, leaving it slightly ajar so he could follow if he wanted to. It almost felt like he was being led into a trap, that somehow he was going to get eaten alive going inside there. The room he was originally afraid of started to seem a lot less frightening in comparison to Justin himself… 

This was his Justin, he had the mind of a 7 year old clearly but he also remembered Giriko… right? If he didn’t then he was certainly weirdly playful with strange older men, which would be a whole other can of worms Giriko just wasn’t going to consider right now. Swallowing back all those thoughts he forced his brain to go blank, he couldn’t think about this, he couldn’t get caught up in being scared he just had to find the stupid brat. It wasn’t like there was anything that would actually maim him back there, this wasn’t even reality. 

Swinging the surprisingly heavy door open with a loud creak Giriko felt a shiver go up his spine at how… hot and humid it was inside. It was such a weird, almost tropical atmosphere he wasn’t fucking expecting at all inside a church. Unlike any tropic climate that people traveled to experience though, this place felt sticky, it made him sweat and become far too aware of every single piece of his skin, every curve of his body where the sweat built up… It had only been a second and he felt like he needed the coldest fucking shower to actually be able to scrub the invasive, unexpected feeling away. 

Where had the brat even gone? The room was incredibly dark, all the light seemingly supposed to come from a large stained glass window that only showed the darkest black night ‘outside’. Squinting to find anything that might provide light or otherwise help him find his way around he managed to run his fingers along a metal plate covered in oddly shaped holes. It seemed promising but before he could even figure out why it seemed that way he had the shit scared out of him when a light suddenly flickered on, glowing through the ordinate grate. 

“Are you here to confess your sins weary traveler?” Justin’s voice came soft and almost weirdly seductive through the covered window, it was so unexpected and shocking that he didn’t respond for a bit, just trying to somehow find where the brat had gone to get to the other side. It seemed like a solid wall but clearly it fucking wasn’t, Justin had gone through this door, Giriko had watched him, the entrance was in here. 

“Justin stop fucking messing around, we aren’t playing here! You have to explain yourself!” Giriko wasn’t going to cater to the fact Justin was a kid right now anymore, this place was fucking driving him insane, he didn’t like it here… Justin might be used to this hell hole but he wasn’t interested in dealing with it himself. 

“If you didn’t want to play then why did you follow? Surely it’s because you’re looking for something here mister. Confess your sins, what are you searching for? What brought you to our church?” Clawing his fingers into the tiny fucking holes of the grate he tried to rip it off, but there was no way for him to actually get enough of a grip on it to do anything. Where the hell was the door? He was going straight back to the feelings he had right when he woke up, he was going to get his hands on this brat so he could find some way out of here.

“Right now I’m looking for  _ you _ , so stop messing around!” Slamming his foot against the wall he watched the old piece of shit jiggle off to the side, a hidden door. Justin didn’t say anything, but Giriko got the impression he knew he was coming, the dead silence felt odd this time… it felt bitter and not with as much guilt as it was melancholy. That should’ve been a sign to stop, to turn around and find his own way out and forget about this weird bratty version of Justin. 

Kicking the door open he came in to see the other side was a small candle lit room, a chair and table where Justin had been sitting in front of the grate. It was empty besides the countless flickering candle flames… Justin had left… but where? Looking around he saw Justin hadn’t left at all, he was in the corner, his knees curled up to his chest and his eyes staring dead into Giriko’s own without any kind of emotion. No… wait. There was something… it was a tired pain. 

All the anger he found inside himself trying to fucking figure out what was going on disappeared all at once. No wonder Justin was so crazy…  _ Giriko  _ was going crazy dealing with everything here, unable to hold onto one emotion very long before a new one came with the sudden changes. It was exhausting, it’d be so much easier to just let it all happen without bothering to react… Justin’s personality suddenly started to give Giriko a weird taste in his mouth. He forced himself to ignore it and go back to the task at hand.

The way Justin was sitting made it look like he was hiding something, like he was hurt and wrapping all his limbs tight together to hide the wound. Just seconds ago he was asking all these weird fucking questions though… what could’ve happened in that amount of time? What was going on here? He had to ask… 

“Justin?” Giriko’s mouth had opened to call for him, but the voice that spoke out wasn’t his own… it wasn’t even human. It sounded wet and broken, gravely and strained while also firm and unrelenting. It was coming from right behind him, Justin was looking over his shoulder at whatever was there, confirming that he wasn’t just letting this place’s insanity get to him and started hearing things. There was a heavy scent of blood starting to mix into the disgusting humidity of the air. Justin didn’t look afraid at all, he just seemed guilty, Giriko on the other hand was fucking terrified of what he’d see.

Turning around Giriko choked on his heart. His entire body went into shock as he was faced with a grey man, completely drained of blood, half his head sliced off in a clean vertical strike, a red kishin egg thrashing out the wound like fire making it look like  _ maybe  _ he still had a head if you were far enough away. Giriko was moving before he even realized it, grabbing Justin up into his arms in a flash and holding him so protectively tight against his chest he might actually suffocate him. 

The horror clinging to his veins never died down no matter how much he stared, there were maggots crawling out of the man’s remaining eye, his uniform was drenched in blood, a chain where Giriko could only assume a cross was ripped off and stuck to the tangled remains of his shirt. Giriko was an old fucking man, he had seen a lot in his life but never had he been faced with a corpse like this, much less one that  _ moved _ . He needed to get Justin out of here, this thing was going to eat him alive…

“Justin, what are you doing? Where are your manners? I came for you so address me properly. Who did you bring here? You know you aren’t supposed to talk to strangers.” Justin started moving, trying to get his face out from Giriko’s chest so he could look at the monster in front of them, the monster fucking  _ calling  _ for him. Giriko couldn’t possibly be more opposed to that idea, he held Justin’s face tight to his skin, the kid didn’t need to see this, no one needed to see this.

“Giriko you can put me down… there isn’t anything to be scared of.” Well, this  _ was  _ his Justin, he knew Giriko, was using his name and actually sounded like he felt bad now. It was like he wished he hadn’t tried to ‘play’ and led them into this. For once Giriko didn’t blame him though, he wasn’t sure how the fuck he could blame a fucking baby for a walking corpse trying to get his attention. 

“What on Earth are you talking about!?” Giriko was trying to look for a way out of here that didn’t involve getting any closer to that thing. It didn’t seem like it was possible, this room was unbearably tiny for having to be shared with this monster… Giriko felt violated even being as close as they were, being trapped in the reflection of it's eye. 

“Giri… Giri it's fine, he’s my dad, he’s dead… he can’t hurt you anymore.” Hearing that was like watching a car crash, Giriko’s brain went silent and the thing staring him down… the thing that had a kishin egg, the mark of a person who decided to eat innocent souls, thrashing from it's skull… and it only seemed to smile with that. Justin… he was raised by this? Haunted by this fucking demon living within his soul? Giriko’s grip got even tighter around Justin and he backed them up further into the wall, even more desperate now to find some way to get Justin out of here. 

Eventually he realized he had to bite the bullet here and just run past the thing, barrelling through, almost vomiting when he felt his bare arm brush against it’s cold sagging skin. It didn’t move to follow them right away, only sighing, annoyed by Giriko’s horror here. Obviously used to being an object of fear. Slamming back out into the chapel they started in he froze solid, all the air around them seemingly getting sucked away, the world freezing.

The pews were filled with poorly propped up dead bodies, clergymen and nuns all ripped apart by what seemed like a different weapon for each one… some of their heads completely cut off and now resting in their hands, mourning flowers stuffed in the the gaping hole where their useless throats still laid. Giriko dropped Justin without even meaning to, falling to the floor to attempt to throw up… where the hell was this?

Justin’s small hand came to brush soothingly down his back, his small babish voice whispering comforts and telling him it would be ok, horribly used to this view and completely unfazed by it all. The comforting didn’t help at all, it just made it worse, more disgusting… 

“I’m sorry, I wanted to play but I should’ve let you wake up before you saw…” Giriko’s chest hurt, he was staring holes into the floor, refusing to look up and see what was surrounding him from all sides again. This place was hell, this was a literal hell Justin existed in. Giriko knew his broken soul was by no means pretty, but it wasn’t filled to the fucking brim with disfigured corpses. Even he wasn’t that bad… 

“We need to get out of here, this… this place can’t- you can’t be ok with this, I’m not ok with this.” Giriko was certain his voice had never sounded so concerned, so protective and demanding. This felt like a special circumstance though, he wasn’t all that shocked or upset by his sudden lack of composure at all. No one could keep it together in here, Justin might be used to it but Giriko knew him well enough that he knew Justin never completely had it together, which made fucking sense now. 

“This is my home Giriko, my family… I’m not leaving, but it's time for you to. It's not good to stay here for too long…” The way those words made Giriko’s heart drop was fucking indescribable. The idea of leaving Justin here was almost impossible to even consider, it would be if it weren’t for the fact that he wasn’t even sure it was possible to remove or somehow change a person’s soul to be less fucking horrific. Looking back up hesitantly he was shocked to see all the bodies were gone, but it didn’t get rid of the image burnt into his mind.

Justin stood up, walking into the center of the chapel again, leaning down to pick up one of the bloody white carnations from the chapel goers. The sad, pitious smile he got as Justin held the flower that seemingly started to wilt the second it came into his hands made a despair he had never felt before settle into his bones. Giriko was no stranger to despair, he had felt more than his fair share of it in his life… but this was a brand new kind. 

“Wake up… there’s nothing worth missing here. Not unless you're me.” The chapel that had looked so beautiful when he had first woken up, the one now smeared with blood and the memories of the dead… it suddenly started to melt right in front of his eyes. Everything smearing around as if Giriko was suddenly going blind… Giriko started tripping over himself before he even realized what he was doing, desperate to get his hands on Justin’s childlike soul one more time before it was over, to tell him it was ok or fucking  _ something _ .

All he got was a chilling sharp smile from the kid, completely and undeniably mad, the carnation completely dead in white knuckles, clutching on like they were choking the life out of the flower. 

Blue flames of a human soul coming out the side of his face like they had for his father. 

Giriko fucking flew out of bed, falling onto the floor in a pile of limbs before he even realized he was in reality again. He hit their floor hard enough that he felt his brain rattle, groaning for a second before popping back up to look at Justin, not breathing as he saw the scythe still completely asleep, looking completely at peace and unconcerned. 

“Justin fucking wake up!! What the fuck was that!?” Giriko took no mercy screaming that at the top of his lungs, making even Justin in his partially deaf glory jump awake in concern, looking around for whatever was going on. When he realized there was no immediate danger he sagged down, sighing so heavily that Giriko was honestly surprised Justin had enough room in this stick-like body for that much air.

“Giriko don’t scream in the middle of the night… you're going to get us a noise complaint.” Grabbing onto Justin’s shoulder he stopped the bastard from rolling back over and trying to go back to sleep. This bullshit wasn’t waiting until tomorrow morning, if Justin would even address it then. Justin gave another sigh and sat up on his elbows, looking over to Giriko with a raised eyebrow, telling him to get it over with and ask whatever he wanted to. Giriko’s mind kind of froze with that, unsure of exactly what he wanted to ask here.

“...Was that real?” Justin looked at him with tired eyes that looked far too old to be on a teenager. He didn’t look exhausted or angry with the question though, just tired with the reality of the situation. Giriko didn’t blame him. Just the expression was an answer to his question, but Justin decided to give him an actual one as well. 

“Do you really think I’d put so much effort into scaring you? I really don’t care enough for that.” Justin’s voice was moody, bratty in the way he got when he was really tired and fucking pissed he was being kept up. It was a sign that Giriko should probably drop it, but at the same time he couldn’t just drop it, there was way too much he needed answered…

“Why’d you let me in? Did you want me to see it?” The silence that came over them as Justin thought about it was agonizing. He really had no idea what Justin’s answer could be, how the hell this had happened and why Justin seemed so nonplussed about having something so personal and honestly traumatic about him revealed. With how cranky and private the scythe was it was surprising he was freaking out right now.

“I don’t know, I guess it was easier this way… I didn’t really plan it or anything, but I went back today and it's all gone.” Giriko didn’t really know what to say to that, Justin’s voice didn’t betray any emotion, in fact it didn’t seem to have any emotion at all… such an overwhelming experience that his mind didn’t even know how to process it yet. There was no way in hell Giriko was going to dare respond to something that goddamn heavy and screw it up, so instead he slowly made his way back into bed and started to curl around Justin.

“Giriko?” It was obvious how confused Justin was by his reaction, not really knowing why Giriko was having such an emotional response to something that didn’t directly affect him… the brat was really such a moron. 

“Just… let me do this, you're tired anyway, just go back to sleep.” Justin made a confused noise, but regardless followed the command and started to relax again, completely ok with being done with this conversation. It didn’t take very long for the scythe to fall asleep, heavy rhythmic breaths matching Giriko’s own. Giriko didn’t fall asleep though, he spent the night staring into the shadows, watching to see if something would come out, as if something other than Justin had caused those images.

Nothing ever came, he’d never have the ability to see the things Justin could see… but for the first time he wanted to, even if just for a bit, just so the brat wouldn’t have to keep facing it alone.

**Author's Note:**

> White carnations symbolize innocence and good luck, they are also traditional a father's day gift (in japan)
> 
> Addressing the flames; I do not support the idea in anyway that victims turn into their abuser, but its a common fear of victims to think they are/they will, and this takes place inside Justin's soul where everything is created by his feelings. 
> 
> Part of the reason i wrote this is because I'm in a constant state of being pissed off that victims are supposed to have the same 'acceptable' response to their abuse and all feel the same way about it, just like everyone else in the world, abuse victims have different thoughts and feelings about what happened and how they want to feel about it and cope with it. Sometimes it's wanting to reclaim with the memories and never truly developing hate for them because you don't want to hate your life and history, that isn't considered ok, and I think thats BS, so thus this fic


End file.
